It hit me last night, that if you hold to the idea of left/right brain differences, most of life’s responsibilities are primarily left brain activities—budgets, scheduling, going here and there, etc.—and I find it difficult sometimes to make that transition over to my creative/feeling side.
I remember starting this portrait of Hannah, painting and drawing with my brush and paint, and the first several attempts were just bad drawing—I was really struggling.. After a while the piece suddenly came flowing onto the canvas like magic. That’s a bit dramatic but that’s how sudden it was. And of course it was work—staying with it– that got me to that place. And I think I struggle almost subconsciously to stay in the Right Brain even when I have to do Left Brain stuff, and that makes it very stressful when “life” comes calling.
I read once that “with every upset is an unmet expectation”. So I tell myself not to expect art-time when I have to do something else. What stresses me is when I don’t fully accept that I have to do something else. If you know you have to do it, then do it wholeheartedly. Otherwise drop it from your agenda, right? Napoleon said “If you’re going to take Vienna, take Vienna”.
Unfortunately I’m the kind of person that gets bent out of shape when I have other things to do —I really have to do a lot of self talk. And I’m sure there are many other parts to the personality/psyche that dictate to us how we are suppose to feel. Funny that I have to battle my own self—you would think I would be on my side most of the time and be more congenial to “me”.
Image: Hanna 24×18 oil on canvas MTMcClanahan